Avoidant Personality Disorder
The term, ?personality disorder’ most often brings to mind those people who are unable to socialize and fit in with their peers. The people often seem strange to everyone else and therefore feel and even become ostracized and alone. The people with Avoidant Personality Disorder fear that exact situation. They avoid social interaction if at all possible. It is not because they are not interested in friendships and other relationships. Instead, they are simply afraid of how they will appear to others. Avoidant Personality Disorder describes more than just shyness. It is a severe problem in interacting with other people.
Problem Situations
The person with Avoidant Personality Disorder, depending on their age, is inexperienced in all kinds of social situations. They do not like to go to parties because of the high expectations for social performance. At parties, the person with Avoidant Personality Disorder does his best to avoid social contact with anyone. If someone does seek out a conversation or some company, the person will seem awkward and inept because he is preoccupied with feelings of inadequacy. The person probably rarely, if ever, goes on dates. He would worry that he is dressed wrong and won’t be funny or charming enough. For those reasons he probably will cancel the date. If he does go, he will be so nervous that he probably will give the date a bad impression of himself, furthering his nervousness for the next potential social encounter.
A third awkward situation is a job interview or even a day at a job that involves social interaction. At work or at school, it is easiest for this person to avoid the situation all together. It is difficult to maintain competency and keep up with others because so many days are missed. Again, the cycle continues. The more the situations are avoided, the more reason there is for the person to actually feel incompetent and awkward and the less likely he will be to continue participation later. The person with Avoidant Personality Disorder has trouble personally and professionally. Even if the awkwardness begins as imagined, it can quickly become a reality.
Symptoms
The person with Avoidant Personality Disorder is not only awkward out of his own self-criticism he is also very sensitive to others’ comments about himself. Whether a slight is real or perceived, they are all very damaging to his self-esteem. He avoids social or professional situations that involve interpersonal interaction. He is always interested in protecting himself from potential ridicule. He is convinced of his own ineptitude and inferiority when compared to others. He also is uninterested in trying new things because they may embarrass him in the end.
Treatment
The best course of action for a person with Avoidant Personality Disorder is to quit avoiding things. In contrast, try anything you can. Expect some embarrassment, but also expect people to love you for your willingness to put yourself out there. Things will get better quickly and you will feel better about yourself if you put yourself into social situations and learn new things.
Frances, Allen MD and First, Michael B. MD. Your Mental Health: A Layman’s Guide to
the Psychiatrist’s Bible. New York: Scribner, 1998.
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